Monday, May 03, 2010

keeping inspiration

The past many months I have been feeling bored of home and craving time away, and so last week, Adelaide, my mom, and I went on an semi-impromptu girls vacation to Hawaii. We had a marvelous time in the sun, hanging out at the beach, swimming in the beautiful ocean, going for long walks, and eating many treats such as the freshest pineapple, shave ice, pho and Japanese curry.

I haven't been feeling very creative recently, and so I was hoping that a trip away would help me to find some of my waning inspiration. But as the week went on I began to feel just a little bit uneasy, because although the trip was marvelous in a "get away from it all" type of way, my inspiration was just not returning. I was feeling... flat in that department. I started wondering to myself, what I would do if all of my inspiration, ideas, and creativity just faded away, and never returned. I began to feel a little bit lost in the world.

And so we returned home to Vancouver. We walked in the front door and I was hit so hard with the cozy happiness of our house. I had really forgotten how great home can be! Once again I saw and I felt the life which, together, we have made for ourselves. And, quietly waiting for me, all of the neatly organised treasures which we have loved and brought into our home. Adelaide's rocks and seashells, much loved old books, family photographs, art made by friends. It felt so good to be home.

And woosh - Inspiration hit me. Hard! In the most unlikely of places - my home. I was filled with an overwhelming desire to create once again. I have so many ideas and all I want to do is lock myself in my workroom and make things! Hurriedly, I jot down ideas and throw together Illustrator files full of shapes, colours, textures. Swipe some chalk from Adelaide and scratch out thoughts onto my neglected chalkboard. I am attempting to capture even a little bit of what is bursting in my brain. Trying to keep it all, trying not to lose it once again.

For of course... my real life as a mama is a little bit more pressing. Adelaide, as if sensing my distraction, is desperate to regain her status as number one in her mama's world. I have been trying to find a way to keep this inspiration and not lose it in amongst all the million other little things that overtake my life and my brain.

Tooth-brushing, pants on front-ways, matching socks, hair-doing, healthy snacking, vegetable eating, tidying, playground visiting, crossing the street, showing, teaching, lunch-making, unclogging stroller wheels, laundry-doing, folding, tidying, bed-making, vacuuming, chasing, changing, tear-wiping, distracting, cat-litter changing, playdohing, cupcake-making, stickerbooking, role-playing, socializing, wiping bottoms, flushing the toilet, bath-running, hair-washing, band-aiding, comforting, story reading, kissing, hugging, encouraging, loving.

But I am happy. I am thrilled that inspiration has returned! And feeling a little bit silly for doubting myself. For becoming a mama - and all that becoming a mama brings - didn't change who I am. But it did make me so much stronger and much more patient and full of more love than I knew was ever possible.

And so I have made my choice. I am determined to encourage and capture my inspiration, and I am determined to be a fabulous mama, too! Here's to making the decision to be the best mamas that we could ever be, and - somehow - not losing ourselves in the fray.

42 comments:

Wendy said...

Love this!

Eren said...

Exactly what the Dr. ordered...time away to appreciate the familiar again. Such a great reminder!

tape_queen said...

You ARE a fabulous mama. Thank you for being an inspiration to all of us. :)

Elle said...

Yay for fabulous, fun loving, creative mamas everywhere!

Danielle said...

Yay indeed!
PS: I found your miniature garden most inspirational :)

unha said...

yay. xoxo

Katie said...

I'm so glad I read this, I've been feeling exactly the same lately. Just blah... Maybe I need a moment away. Anyway, it's so nice to know I'm not the only one with self doubt and panic that I don't have anymore good ideas in my head. Thank you!

Nicole Austin said...

hello, i am a new reader of your blog and i find these words so true! i am a mama to a small one and i find myself going through the same ups and downs.

natalie said...

Such a wonderful reminder to appreciate what's around us every day. Thank you!

Julie said...

So lovely....and I have to tell you that I am about to book my flight to Hawaii! My husband is going there for work and I am going to join him for a week. I can not wait, and I hope to return home and that I have the same fabulous feeling as you did when I walk through the doors. Sometimes it just takes that little time away to see things in a different way.
Cheers!

babalisme said...

Adelaide is so lucky to have you as you are to her. I know, being a mama is like an endless rabbit hole of tasks but it's very rewarding and inspiring at the same time. Good luck to you both!

mon ami said...

Thank you for this post. I really needed a little reminder that I am not the only one who struggles with balancing my creative whirlwinds and motherhood.

I am so glad you have found your inspiration - both for your sake and my sake because I find YOU inspiring!

Heather H said...

So inspiring. I'm glad that I found your blog -- it's serendipitous. I'm grateful for a reminder of the power to choose!

amberlee said...

Just wonderful words! It can be so hard to find balance and me time. I love this post, love it.

miranda said...

such a perfect snapshot of a mama's day - sometimes such a struggle against the whoosh of creativity at the same time as being such a source of and reason for it. i've been feeling those ups and downs too lately and it's nice to know it's something we all experience!

happy to hear you're feeling the flow! :-)

Amanda said...

What a beautiful post. I am so glad your inspiration has returned. As mothers, it can often feel as though we have so many responsibilties, I am so glad you are finding time to engage with your creating and design work too as well as being such a fabulous mummy to Adelaide :) xx

charismagic said...

Good for you! An inspirational post for someone who's hoping to be a mama next year xox

ines said...

Thank-you Sharilyn, your post was most inspiring. I woke up this morning thinking about all the little things that I have to do today that will fill my day until it is almost dark out, once my boys have gone to sleep. It is then that I can bask in my quiet time, to sit and go through my list of ideas and things that I would like to do. It is so easy to brush that aside because there are more pertinent things at hand, tasks to complete, chores to do. My husband always reminds me to take time to do the things that I want to do because my happiness is their happiness, a happy woman makes a happy mama a happy wife a happy life. Thanks for being a lovely inspiration.

Alice Clair said...

What a wonderful post. I am feeling completely uninspired as well. I just graduated and am now starting my career as a freelance artist, however I don't even know where to start! I'm not sure if it's nerves or a lack of inspiration. Perhaps I just need a vacation so I can come home :)

Carrie Anne said...

I wish I could favorite this post a hundred million times! Bravo, Mama. Bravo.

roberta said...

I love this entry. Loved it so much I'm going to write a couple of lines on my chalkboard wall as a simple reminder. Thanks.

Lori Miller Cline said...

beautiful - thank you for sharing your life with us!

L

Nihan SARI, Illustrations. said...

you are so good mama and have a lovely little girl.thank for your sharing.

Anonymous said...

I have been following your blog for many months now. I don't even recall how I stumbled across it. I love your writing, your pictures, your thoughts, your ideas. All of it inspire me. I live in Texas but I think we would be friends if we lived closer. You are very talented.

cindy said...

you are fabulous at being a mama and an artist. you are a wonderful multi-tasker and able to wear both hats beautifully. sometimes, a little trip away from our everyday lives is just what we need to realize there's no place like home. sounds like a good idea for a movie. oh yeah, it's already been made - 'the wizard of oz'.

patricialoves said...

thank you for being such inspiration to us mums {and non-mums} and for sharing your life, love, & thoughts to the world.

can't wait to see what your creative streak will bring this time. love this post :)

Gingerly said...

Here's to dueling priorities and deciding to love every moment of it! My little guy is 8 months old and I am just encountering this for myself - wanting to devote time to my creative projects and still give the best of my time that I can to him! I'm excited to see what you're working on now!

kat-teamkitten said...

OOH i totally hear you on this. It's hard managing all the parts that come with being a mum PLUS trying to be creative and work from home at the same time. My son is 2 and the only time i get to do my own creative things are during his nap time (when he decides to take it) and after he goes down to sleep at night - at which stage i'm sooo exhausted and just want to veg out myself, plus being 36 weeks pregnant will do that. I'm so glad you have your mojo back! Time away is always good for the mind and soul... can't wait to see what you come up with! xo

Home Made Modern Mom said...

I love your list of mama duties...mine looks so similar, I just had to smile and pat myself on the back for all the things that get accomplished in one day. Thanks for sharing! Especially the part about how being a mom didn't change--only enhanced--who you are.

Hannahbelle, Natty & Ari said...

You are an inspiration :)

josefina said...

I've gone through the same feelings of being unmotivated and uninspired, and it helps to be reminded of what I've been blessed with and to have joy in life no matter the circumstances. Thank you for your beautiful and inspirational post.

kate / tinywarbler said...

what a great post! i've been feeling a little uninspired as of late myself. i'm glad to hear that it came back.
i love that last paragraph.

uppaparent said...

There is no place like home - every time we go away, there's always a sense of relief to coming back to my daughter's crib, and her changing table, and our rocking chair.

{little.happy.things} said...

You ARE a fabulous mom and you are my inspiration! Looking forward to do the same with my coming baby!

sunny said...

So happy you're inspired again! I love your blog..and love everything you write about. Your daughter is very charming and adorable.

julie green said...

Sharilyn, I've just discovered your blog (I've visited your shop often in the past) and I just wanted to tell you how truly lovely and inspiring it is. I'll be back often, I'm sure.

dorisdays said...

I love this and thank you for sharing. I find that I also get the loss of creativity and inspiration.

Thanks again!

dharmaflyer said...

I am with you on this one Sharilyn. Being a mummy is wonderful but sometime you can lose sight of your sense of self. It's great to do wonderful things with you children but you have to make a space for yourself from time to time. For me and mine, creativity stimulates the whole family and we have now reached the stage (mine are aged 5 & 10) where they can make their own play. It took me ages to figure out that I did not have to be the one creating play. Children have the amazing ability to turn anything into play even a bit of discarded cotton on the floor can become a wiggly worm. I now am more happy to let the children's play evolve and this allows me more time for my own creativity to flow. Lisa x

Zoe said...

I'm fourteen years old, and I love reading your blog... I have always wanted to be an artist and you are such an inspiration to me. I find myself thinking, "I want my life to be like hers. I want exactly what she has." Because I think you have found what many people are searching for; simplicity and love. Your art is beautiful and I hope someday I can be like you, and create such beautiful things.

elena said...

you are the best, thank you!

www.rivas-vaciamadrid.biz said...

A great deal of effective info for me!

Stephen said...

This cannot have effect in actual fact, that's what I think.
california health insurance | the casket | california state fund workers compensation | brake repair costs | quilting fabric